Time of my life

← →

Milk vent*

September 6, 2009 · 2 Comments

* Steer clear if you’re tired of my EP story.

—————————

Again.

I have clog again. Sigh.

I can’t take it anymore. I just want to give up pumping now and rid myself of another painful episode. No more agonising over swollen and tender lump(s), bending over the pumps, compressing those tender bb’s while screaming! And lately, my supply is just enough for baby’s daily consumption. Some days I have to do catch up just like I first pumped, which is quite stressful. With this clog, I am lagging at least 6 oz today. Yikes!

Call me insane or perfectionist (my husband called me the latter, how kind of him) or whatever you want but deep in my heart, I can not bring myself to wean my son of breast milk. Or stop feeding him breast milk exclusively, for that matter. For me, breast milk is the superior food for babies, considering all its nutritional values. My baby has not been sick one day of his life! He is bright and happy. Wait a minute, he could be bright because of our genes, not due to breast milk, so… :D

Ok, enough goofing.

My husband gave me another “stop-being-a-perfectionist” talk this morning.

“It is good enough to feed our son breast milk exclusively for 7.5 months”.

“It’s ok to supplement with formula from now on.”

“I’m not asking you to stop pumping completely. Just add a little bit of formula la.”

But I’ll regret if I do not try my best now. It’s not like we’ll have a dozen of kids. Just this once or maybe a second time later. I’ll really like him to have breast milk as long as he can. Maybe a year?

“I assure you, you’ll still have regrets even if you do pump for one whole year. Because you are such a perfectionist. That’s what perfectionist does.”

Sigh. I don’t know what I should do now. Should I try fenugreek, alfafa and blessed thistle to try boosting my supply? Should I take Lecithin to prevent clogs (but surprisingly, none of my doctor or pharmacist friends ever learnt of Lecithin for this purpose)? Should I start supplementing?

I don’t know. I just know one thing. The clogged milk has to come out now. Right at this instance. My brain can not function when all the blood is down there.

Wish me luck!

Categories: Exclusively pumping · Parenting

2 responses so far ↓

  • Min Ney // September 10, 2009 at 12:15 pm | Reply

    I think you are doing a really good job! I think exclusive pumping is harder than breastfeeding!!

    I agree with Mok that even you supply breast milk for one whole year, you will still find it hard to wean yourself from providng breast milk for your little prince.

    At least that is true for me :) . I am still breast feeding Aurelius, and I remembered I had really hard time weaning Augustus when he was 23 months old…..

    All the best.

    Min Ney

  • regalmok // September 10, 2009 at 10:10 pm | Reply

    Thanks so much for the encouragement! Sometimes I feel very lonely in this journey because not many people can understand what I’m going through.. But you are a pro in bf so you know :)

    23 months!! That’s fantastic! I don’t know if I can ever do that. You go, girl!

Leave a Comment